bloom of youth

arght!! i cant sleep alone.

2009-05-08T11:18:00.003+08:00

still, i cant sleep alone. the "imagination" keeps haunting me..i stop praying to God last year.that was because..i disobeyed His commandments.its like im a liar.a total slut. okay stop. i wont mess up my mind with these things anymore.they just made me mad.

my mind empty.please someone..could you please fill it with happiness...?[cheh..!!] i ruined my good days......i hate badzkicka. she is shit. damn. im not her anymore. i killed her. buaoahahhaa. aahaha?? badzkicka is created by me from the words of bad + kick+ ass. LOL

atlantis the lost city

2009-05-07T17:53:00.008+08:00

atlantis...exist or not.??

researchers had found pyramid,statue,road,building,temple etc in the bottom of the atlantis ocean. all those things have similarity with plato's description about atlantis. contrary to popular beliefs, atlantis have hi-tech than mankind nowadays. the people praised false gods and knonnya those gods were aliens that gave them knowledges to help them in civilizations. well theory is a theory.

my tekak gtal2 ler....dunno y.? allergic or what.hoh..
oh ya bout the surat,3 days ago i rang kml and the clerk said "x paya surat twaran dikk,asal pointer ikt syarat p ja mdaftar trus." isk3...ni la ni if jadi pdt student. pdt-program dua tahun.adui tu la dlu nda study rajin2. skg bru mo strive hard kono.isk3 lai..

after a while

2009-05-06T10:21:00.003+08:00

im packing my stuff this weekend.. i'll go to labuan this 11 may. im gonna miss my family. one year is not a long period. i will study hard and smart.there is this one saying,"practice hard does not makes perfect, perfect practice makes perfect."

oh man im forced to join the orientation weeks. who force? kika force me to do so. thats okay. you won't missed any benefits from that. and again...the same routine that i'll do: sleep,eat,study,sleep,eat,study bla bla bla bla bla.....

swine flu attack

2009-05-04T14:54:00.004+08:00

swine flu. is that dangerous???? swine flu refers to influenza caused by strains of influenza virus that usually infect pigs and are called swine influenza virus. well eating sasau or babi hutan will not raise the problem. the current issue here is about the flu that has already attack us. only people who work with pigs especially people with intense exposure are at risk of catching swine flu.

kika playin with face expression

2009-05-02T18:37:00.011+08:00

i made this video just for fun. me bt2 muka kiut wakkaka

arght full tape ada error skit....so...ni ja la.wakkaka

no cry no more

2009-05-01T10:21:00.005+08:00

forget yesterday.today is the day.hahaha.my spectacle snapped.dunno who done it.but dont care.im gonna make a new one.more cool than before.hihihihihi.i just saw two budak pilak in front of my house.the budak pilaks wandering around in front of our gate.if they try to steal im gonna chase em.give em lesson and watch em cried.well im not that bad.lol.

aaaarght..!! waiting the surat tawaran.when will it arrive ha.???

my broken spectacle

im so pissed off today

2009-04-30T18:01:00.021+08:00

hell yeah those relatives.they came here and pissed me off.they ignore me but still aware of my existence.how long i will be in this scenery? do you think i care that much? you can think whatever you want but please dont disturb my life. that should be enough.

you just believing too much of what she:the ignorant said. im not in pressure or what bla bla but please,could you please just be fair? of course im satisfied with my life. i enjoy my day. thats why i need to stay away from close minded people like you.

now i hate people smoking around me.my lungs ache.it was hard to breathe.maybe i will die very soon..i dont want to cheat myself.now let me be honest. i dont love anyone. my heart still in pain. eventhough it has been 3 years, i still cant forget the dark memories. to forget it was just too hard.ah you dont know it.you just dont understand.its just a waste of time to explain it to you .i need someone to erase it off...someone that can heal my deeper wound. someone that can makes me feel alive..

i had experienced a lot of things in KML.i dont want to mention it.it was more than an embarassment.after a few incident occurs, some of them thought i was fierce,bad, bla bla bla.fuck it man.fuck off. im not that person. YOU DONT KNOW ME THAT WELL. you think you know me well, well you dont know me.

this is my life.im living in a small world.my world.my little world.there is an end to all this.

i have seen a lot of variety peoples around me.oh yeah im lazy to make a story for that.i have no time to describe your personality unless we make an epic.lol.

im tired.hahahha everyone gets tired with this hectic world.

na cium kaki ku

houling dog

2009-04-29T15:30:00.005+08:00

yes.!!! i made it. i was chosen into the PST years.. congratulation kika..

and again... i'll go to labuan this 11 May. now waiting the surat tawaran..wahahahhaha..

why im scared.??!!!!!!!

alien cases

2009-04-28T13:10:00.008+08:00

contrary to the evidences from those alien witnesses, it was hard to say whether they are true or not. i was hoping to experience the same things so that i can make a speculation for this whole things as for myself and to anyone who interested to know it. my head still filled with curiousity. it's not about to believe or not. i just wondering, wondering too much. i just wanna know what actually it was??

knowledge speaks it all

2009-04-26T10:39:00.006+08:00

feel the wind..

mixed feelings

2009-04-25T11:12:00.009+08:00

well i cant wait the pdt final result that will come out on this 27 april. last night i scratched my pimple so it became red until now[i'll show you the pimple later]. im so sad that my clean face dirt with few pimples. the pimple suddenly attack my face since i went to labuan. the weather there was just not good for me. actually im still thinking. where will i head my life direction if things turn to unexpected?

*me back

pimples at both of my cheekjust a few. its not too many la .!!!

Here are 10 ways to feel better in the moment:

Get quiet and take 3 deep breathes, slowly in and out.

Put on music that makes you feel good and calm, sing.

Start reciting your favorite positive affirmations, yes you should have some.

Call a friend who makes you laugh, not one who commiserates with you.

Go online and read jokes or find a joke book and laugh, laugh, laugh.

Go for a short walk.

Write your bad feelings on a piece of paper then shred it or tear it up and throw it away.

Next, write good feelings on a piece of paper, fold it up and put it in your wallet or pocketbook and keep it.

Pull out a picture or photo album of your loved ones, especially if you are in the pictures, study them, remember the event, allow your mind to wander.

Simply smile, it can be a fake smile at first but the longer you smile the more genuine it will become. Try it.

"It's all in your head." Feeling good is a choice, just like feeling bad is a choice. Let go of thoughts that try to control you.

If you will begin to change the way you see things, the problems may not stop overnight but you will feel better in the meantime. And then depending on the strength of your beliefs, your life will get better and better. How fast this happens is totally up to you.

In the words of Abraham, "There is nothing more important than that you feel good."

i hate this bear.it was disgusting and smell stinky. omg it's ojie bear.

why is everyone so mean these days?

2009-04-24T12:03:00.002+08:00

because we are at the end of days.

but how we know we are in the last days?

taken from watchtower.org :

World Wars

Jesus foretold that 'nation would rise against nation and kingdom against kingdom.' (Matthew 24:7)
In 1914 the world became involved in a war that saw the mobilizing of
nations and kingdoms in a way that was different from any war before
it. In recognition of that fact, historians at the time called it the
Great War. It was the first war of its kind in history, the first world
war. Some 20,000,000 soldiers and civilians lost their lives, far more
than in any previous war.

World War I marked the beginning of the last days. Jesus said that
this and other events would be "a beginning of pangs of distress." (Matthew 24:8)
That proved true, as World War II was even more deadly, some 50,000,000
soldiers and civilians losing their lives. In this 20th century, well
over 100,000,000 people have been killed in wars, more than four times
as many as in the previous 400 years put together! What an enormous
condemnation of human rule!

Other Evidences

Jesus included other features that would accompany the last days:
"There will be great earthquakes, and in one place after another
pestilences [disease epidemics] and food shortages." (Luke 21:11) That well fits events since 1914, as there has been a huge increase in the distresses from such calamities.

Major earthquakes are regular occurrences, taking many lives. The
Spanish influenza alone killed about 20,000,000 people following World
War I—some estimates being 30,000,000 or more. AIDS has taken hundreds
of thousands of lives and could take millions more in the near future.
Each year millions of people die of heart ailments, cancer, and other
diseases. Millions more die the slow death of hunger. Without a doubt
the 'horsemen of the Apocalypse' with their wars, food shortages, and
disease epidemics have been cutting down large numbers of the human
family since 1914.—Revelation 6:3-8.

Jesus also foretold the increase in crime that is experienced in all
lands. He said: "Because of the increasing of lawlessness the love of
the greater number will cool off."—Matthew 24:12.

Further, Bible prophecy foretold the moral collapse so evident
throughout the world today: "In the last days critical times hard to
deal with will be here. For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of
money, self-assuming, haughty, blasphemers, disobedient to parents,
unthankful, disloyal, having no natural affection, not open to any
agreement, slanderers, without self-control, fierce, without love of
goodness, betrayers, headstrong, puffed up with pride, lovers of
pleasures rather than lovers of God, having a form of godly devotion
but proving false to its power . . . Wicked men and impostors will advance from bad to worse." (2 Timothy 3:1-13) All of that has come true right before our eyes.

Another Factor

There is another factor responsible for the huge increase in
suffering in this century. Coinciding with the beginning of the last
days in 1914, something happened to put mankind in even greater danger.
At that time, as a prophecy in the last book of the Bible relates: "War
broke out in heaven: Michael [Christ in heavenly power] and his angels
battled with the dragon [Satan], and the dragon and its angels [the
demons] battled but it did not prevail, neither was a place found for
them any longer in heaven. So down the great dragon was hurled, the
original serpent, the one called Devil and Satan, who is misleading the
entire inhabited earth; he was hurled down to the earth, and his angels
were hurled down with him."—Revelation 12:7-9.

What were the consequences for the human family? The prophecy
continues: "Woe for the earth and for the sea, because the Devil has
come down to you, having great anger, knowing he has a short period of
time." Yes, Satan knows that his system is nearing its end, so he is
doing everything he can to turn humans against God before he and his
world are put out of the way. (Revelation 12:12; 20:1-3)
How debased those spirit creatures are because they misused their free
will! How awful conditions have been on earth under their influence,
especially since 1914!

It is no wonder that Jesus foretold of our time: "On the earth anguish of nations, not knowing the way out . . . Men become faint out of fear and expectation of the things coming upon the inhabited earth."—Luke 21:25, 26.

End of Human and Demon Rule Near

How many Bible prophecies remain to be fulfilled before God destroys this present system? Very few! One of the last is at 1 Thessalonians 5:3, which states: "While they are talking of peace and security, all at once calamity is upon them." (The New English Bible) This shows that the end of this system will begin "while
they are talking." Unforeseen by the world, destruction will strike
when least expected, when the attention of humans is on their hoped-for
peace and security.

Time is running out for this world under Satan's influence. Soon it
will come to its end in a time of trouble of which Jesus said: "Then
there will be great tribulation such as has not occurred since the
world's beginning until now, no, nor will occur again."—Matthew 24:21.

The climax of the "great tribulation" will be God's war of
Armageddon. That is the time spoken of by the prophet Daniel when God
will "crush and put an end to all these kingdoms." This will mean the
end of all present human rulerships independent of God. His Kingdom
rule from heaven will then take over complete control of all human
affairs. Never again, Daniel foretold, will governing authority be left
"to any other people."—Daniel 2:44; Revelation 16:14-16.

At that time all satanic and demon influence will also cease. Those
rebellious spirit creatures will be put out of the way so that they
cannot "mislead the nations anymore." (Revelation 12:9; 20:1-3)
They have been sentenced to death and await destruction. What a relief
it will be for mankind to be free from their debasing influence!

Who Will Survive? Who Will Not?

When God's judgments are executed against this world, who will
survive? Who will not? The Bible shows that those who want God's rule
will be protected and will survive. Those who do not want God's rule
will not be protected but will be destroyed along with Satan's world.

Proverbs 2:21, 22
says: "The upright [those who submit to God's rule] are the ones that
will reside in the earth, and the blameless are the ones that will be
left over in it. As regards the wicked [those who do not submit to
God's rule], they will be cut off from the very earth; and as for the
treacherous, they will be torn away from it."

Psalm 37:10, 11 also says: "Just a little while longer, and the wicked one will be no more . . .
But the meek ones themselves will possess the earth, and they will
indeed find their exquisite delight in the abundance of peace." Verse 29 adds: "The righteous themselves will possess the earth, and they will reside forever upon it."

We should take to heart the counsel of Psalm 37:34,
which states: "Hope in Jehovah and keep his way, and he will exalt you
to take possession of the earth. When the wicked ones are cut off, you
will see it." Verses 37 and 38
say: "Watch the blameless one and keep the upright one in sight, for
the future of that man will be peaceful. But the transgressors
themselves will certainly be annihilated together; the future of wicked
people will indeed be cut off."

How comforting, yes, how inspiring it is to know that God really
does care and that soon he will put an end to all wickedness and
suffering! How thrilling it is to realize that the fulfillment of those
glorious prophecies is but a short time off!

lovelihood

2009-04-23T10:29:00.003+08:00

4 days left. im waiting. yes. i count the day. so what. im one of those freako. i got nothing to do else other than blogging, fs and music. if my head go blank i will stain blank paper and write things that i hate. that was a good way to release tension i guess. oh blogging2..

back in the day of my past where i was too young, i was immature and naive. yes i really admit that. remembering it back was a pain. after several incident occurs, i decide to strip of my old personalities and cloth myself with a new one.

now im living my life.

tips to enjoy a wonderful and happy day : make each day of your life a great, wonderful and satisfying day.

smoke does really bad for you health

2009-04-21T13:59:00.003+08:00

how far i've been thinking.
sorrow,happiness on those times.it's too good to be true if i can back to past,coz i'll correct the wrong things that i had done.dreams dreams...when we had just started things.

lets forget the past and ahead for future.

littlest things

2009-04-19T19:45:00.002+08:00

im speechless.after saw your old skul face pictures.because its all about what you are in the past.i dont know why but i can see pathetic memories through those pictures.im currently not in mood.

KML PDT RESULT.

2009-04-18T18:11:00.003+08:00

PDT 2008/2009 final result will be announce on 27 APRIL.

its getting late already,im goin to shower. ja~

friends forever

2009-04-07T16:40:00.011+08:00

kia,daling,vie, n me kika mnum2 time stayout.time d pancur htam pele men jongkat jongket wakakkakaka omg

na ni tajuk pic dah "koh fasiha" asal p bilik da ni konfom tdur jak tu keja da...ahaha 24 hours owh
u guys rock my world.!!!

the day

2009-04-06T20:50:00.013+08:00

ya ya ya ya ya.now waiting for pdt final result.. if I AM chosen..i'll back to KML again....and.........face the hard days...well thats the challenges.!!!!!! lifes really gettin harder u kno. ourafhghhghq9f03g0[what am i doing??]

job job job job??????part time job?????????????? im still thinkin bout it.hmm..? :)

i dont wanna get stuck in this house for a month.it was tiring and sick sitting in front of this laptop everyday.i need some excitement.!!!! adventure and action.!!! LOL.

okay....im just a student,a college student.i dont have that much money to go wherever places that i want.now i need money.

so, for now. im going to BLABBER BLABBER BLABBER BLA BLA BLA BLA. i dont know what to do. what?? get a life?? hell yeah. this is life!! hahahahhaha

keningau

2009-04-04T15:29:00.003+08:00

kgu..? nothin change here..just ppl around..well not really hectic just pathetic..

i just got this invitation card to hotel juta for celebrating ulang tahun kematian Yesus Kristus on 9 April.

Mozart symphony 25 and 40

2009-04-02T12:21:00.005+08:00

mozart makes me feel alive.what a ingenious piece of music.awesome.

muehehehhe this i take from ojie c golombon yg tlh mjd thin.prasan.

1. Name the people you tagged.
- whoever seen my blog.

2. Describe yourself in one word.
- miserable.lol

3.Who would you pick, someone who really loves you, or the one you love?
- both!!

4.Have you ever loved someone before but never had the courage to tell him/her?
- hahaha i am a straightforward person.mulut x bertapis.kdg2 je.

5.How if people reject you confess face to face?
- what to do.

6.God is giving you just 5 minutes before going back to heaven, IF you love someone special, what will you say to that person?
- error.

7.What will you say to a person who doesn't want to believe you?
- up to u man.

8.Was ever a time that you tried to learn to love someone?
- i never learn to love.it come spontaneously.my love is natural.

9.Do you have something special with you all the time?
- no need to tell la.

10.Long distance love?
- almost 1 year.

11.Best place to cry.
- graveyard.

12.Who do you love the most?
- la la la.

13.Tell us of your dream last night.
- i dream...hm i dun even remember.

14.Ever hated someone so bad?
- eh..ya.but now not really la.

15.The biggest & most hurtful lie you heard.
- i forget.lol

16.The last person you had a beer with?
- with pele,kia,daling n v.miahahaha

17. The last person you went to the movies with?
- si a....

18.The last person you talked on the cell phone with?
- la la la.

19. The last person you hugged?
- la la la la.

20.The last person you yelled atyen?
- my sis.?

21.In the last week have you kissed someone?
- la la la la~

22.Think of the last time you were angry, why were you angry?
- crap thoughts!!!!!!!!!

23.If you could do anything or wish anything, what would it be?
- i want to guling2 in the greeny grass field with some flowers on it.
fresh air fill up my mind..with clouds in the blue sky...i feel so relax..
and comfortable..

24.If you could have an all expense paid trip, where will you go?
- japan hot spring..........

25.What you hate the most?
- when my sis korek taik idung da.

26.What would be the hardest thing for you to give up on?
- myself..

27.Five facts About Me.
- talkative on time
- dislike unnecessary things
- music lover
- unpredictable
- love foods!!!

28.Five things that scare me:
- insects.i HATE INSECTS!! they r disgusting
- height phobia
- tahi
- ermmm
- ehh...???

29.Two Songs Playing in My Head Lately.
- lily allen-the fear
- mozart:symphony 25

30.Five Things I treasure in my life:
1) family
2) friends
3) music
4) studies
5) my lover....

theory of happiness

2009-04-01T18:44:00.004+08:00

When I started looking for true happiness

I started to think that I wanted to be in love and be loved back

And then I started to appreciate all of your strengths

and the weaknesses you tend to keep hidden

You laugh and you cry and show me the real you

and I just use all my energy on you

So I don’t wish for anything at all from the flow of time or the color of the sky

But I never saw any true happiness around

And I never realized that it was right there the entire time

And then it dawned on me one day

that the only thing these numb fingers need are those familiar hands of yours

So if it’s for that melody of yours,

or your philosophy or your words and

everything else I wouldn’t mind a little effort on my part in order to protect them.

You laugh and you cry and show me the real you

and so I love you just the way you are

So I don’t wish for anything at all

from the flow of time or the color of the sky.

That’s why I’ll protect that melody of yours and your philosophy, and your words and everything else to the very end

You’re there living your life and just knowing this simple little fact makes me so happy.

lazy day

2009-03-31T11:35:00.008+08:00

my very cute lil kitten. notty2. haha. got big eyes, kin geram. suka lompat2 ni.
well im thinkin of u ;)

im tired

2009-03-30T19:14:00.004+08:00

im just thinking too much about unnecessary things. to lead life is to take responsibility for all things that we face in everyday life. im tired because of my thoughts.

after pdt final examination

2009-03-29T10:51:00.012+08:00

Kolej Matrikulasi Labuan[kml] although pdt had already break free from kml,we have to remind ourself that it was not too long before the result come out.

finally i came back home, seeing each other for a while and having a great time together.

FEBRUARY : abstract thoughts . loves reality and abstract . intelligent and clever . changing personality . attractive . sexy . temperamental . quiet , shy and humble . honest and loyal . determined to reach goals . loves freedom . rebellious when restricted . loves aggressiveness . too sensitive and easily hurt . gets angry really easily but does not show it . dislikes unnecessary things . loves making friend but rarely shows it . daring and stubborn . ambitious . realizes dreams and hopes . sharp . loves entertainment and leisure . romantic on the inside not outside . superstitious and ludicrous . spendthrift . tries to learn to show emotions .

friends in kml

on the way to kuala penyu,camping trip.

at marine park

kokum time

camp trip

when u say u love me

2009-03-28T21:27:00.011+08:00

Our love story

it all happened when i had done something terrible but has attract ur feelings to get close to me.u said that u like me since 1st smester but u dnt hav the courage to approach me bcoz u think that it was hard.so at that time,u have a lot of girlfriends and one of them was my friend,maxine.after not a very long time, u guys break up just like that.coz u said that, she was a queen control.then u had another new girlfriend but break up also.

after the "stay out", u msg me and we became friends.not long after that, u said that u like me.and u told me all about ur personal things.we share our secret together n promise to not tell anyone about it.in a short period of time,u confessed ur love to me.so we became a couple. v n max said that u have change after we were together.

i dont know if our love will last longer.yes i trust u but u have to prove it to me.im so happy that i met u.u understand me very well and i feel calm each time we were together.u bright up my life.i love u.
me and cyril.he is a lover.

bha ckup la tu syg~